


Buon Natale

by YamiBaki



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Christmas Party, Enjoy the feels, M/M, Marriage Proposal, One-Sided Attraction, Read at Your Own Risk, Reader Insert, Reborn being Reborn, Rejection, Sad, Tsuna is too kind, Why Did I Write This?, male reader - Freeform, rip your own heart out, you know me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-08-22 02:02:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8268547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiBaki/pseuds/YamiBaki
Summary: Being born from a single teenage mother and abandoned at the doorsteps of an orphanage at 3, he grew up with nuns who taught him everything he knew about God. And he had tried hard to remain faithful, but it was all in vein. He's ruined it. He took the chance and went on impulse, and ruined the platonic relationship he had with his boss. Ah, but what can you do?





	

This was not where he wanted to be, not where he intended to be at all.   
  
But he could never say no to Juudaime...   
  
The bright lights upon the christmas tree and illuminating the room, the decorations that sparkled like stars, a sweet scent in the air of delicious treats and the clanging of glass against glass, all in celebration of something important to all of them.   
  
Christmas, a day where friends and family gather together to give gifts to one another, to show each other love and be in peace and harmony. It was a tradition for the families that had strong ties with the Vongola family to hold a large celebration, the Cavellone, the Bovino and many others were their. Subordinates of many of these families hung out with others, teasing, play fighting, chatting, laughing with one another. Malice could not be found, and no one walked through those doors with ill intentions.   
  
He still remembered the world as innocent as the party seemed to make the night appear.   
  
Laughing, smiling, running around and even gazing up at the tree with bright, curious eyes filled with wonder and innocence.   
  
Innocence he had long since lost...   
  
“Are you enjoying the party?”  
  
Turning, (y/n) couldn't help the smile that graced his lips, as the man he had come to love appeared before him. His attire was just as beautiful as he himself was, with his eyes still holding onto that wonder and innocence that not many mob bosses held. He was precious to the Vongola family, he was precious to _(y/n)_. “It's a great party, everyone looks so happy,” the (h/c) haired assassin complimented, turning his body away from the christmas tree in order to fully face his boss. A pure white suit and soft marigold tie, it matched his aura and personality perfectly and made him look too pure to be there where mobsters all gathered together. “You did great boss, it's beautiful.”   
  
Tsuna smiled a little wider at him, not realizing that the small gesture was enough to make the younger male's heart race. “I'm glad, you looked like you were conflicted, Reborn said that lately your perfect shots have been wavering.”   
  
“Reborn says a lot of things.” (Y/n) mumbled, puffing out his cheeks in slight annoyance.   
  
He never really liked the hitman, but he was his teacher after all, and (y/n) knew that his feelings towards the man were due to his own selfishness.  
   
A chuckle escaped Tsuna's lips. “I know what you mean,” he began, before turning towards the christmas tree, gazing up at its bright lights and beautiful decoration. “But Reborn means well, he knows that you're trying hard, and he's most likely worried about you. Even if he doesn't show it.”   
  
“Maybe...” (Y/n) muttered, lifting his glass of Champaign to his lips and taking a sip. The bubbling sensation ran down his throat, reminding him of just how good the Vongola family was when it came to its celebrations, meals and drinks.   
  
“You can always come to me whenever you want to talk, you know,” Tsuna told him, turning away from the christmas tree for a moment to face the (y/n) haired male. “If you have something on your mind, you can tell me and I'll listen to you. You're part of the family, so it's no problem.”   
  
“You're too kind, Boss.” (Y/n) replied in a hushed tone, smiling rather sadly down at the now empty champagne glass in his hand. _'Too kind to someone like me...'_    
  
He would have been dead without Tsuna's help, he would have been just another dead body in the slums of Italia, unidentified with no relatives alive to give him a proper burial. But Tsuna prevented that, Tsuna arrived right when (y/n) needed someone the most.  
  
 _'But as grateful as I am, I need to stay away from him...'_ The assassin thought, gazing at the boss he had come to adore from the corner of his eyes. _'I'm not pure enough to stand by him anymore... My intentions aren't pure at all... Reborn must have noticed it...'_    
  
Being born from a single teenage mother and abandoned at the doorsteps of an orphanage at 3, he grew up with nuns who taught him everything he knew about God. And he had tried hard to remain faithful, but it was all in vein. Fights, theft, drug dealings, he's been in many of those positions at least once, growing up without anyone there to guide him in the right path. When Tsuna had found him, he was being pushed to the ground and overpowered by goons, with a gun pressed to his head as they demanded money from him. A friend had run off and left him behind to deal with the debt, one of which he had made sure to pay back to said friend in later years, with a bullet to his head.   
  
The sight was beautiful, those golden orange flames, those sharp eyes and that agility. It was almost as though he had been watching a dance, it was just so unreal and so fast, and Tsunayoshi was so strong on the battlefield.   
  
He almost resembled an angel.  
  
Since then (y/n) decided to follow the man, whose hand was outstretched towards a troubled boy, and protect him with his life.   
  
It wasn't long until it was shown that (y/n) was a great shot, being able to take out people from a distance using only one bullet from any gun that was placed within his palms. Reborn took an interest in him one day, and decided that training was in order, and although the younger male hated it, he went along with the Hitman in order to improve his skills and be of more use to Tsuna.   
  
The one thing (y/n) didn't count on was his feelings for his boss to get out of hand.   
  
His radiant light, his kindness, his soothing voice and encouraging words, everything about him caused something to grow within the younger male that he never expected.   
  
Ah, but his boss would never feel the same, not when he had someone already dear to him.   
  
That, and (y/n) was of no use to the man any more, especially since he was anything but pure for compared to Tsunayoshi. His hands were soaking in the blood of so many, he's dealt with drugs and watched how desperate others became to that addictive white powder or the sharp end of that needle, he's even known what it's like to capture the innocent heart of young women and taint them, crushing them easily until they shatter into a million pieces. He was not a good guy, he knew that, the others knew that as well, and he was sure that Tsunayoshi himself saw it.   
  
He could still remember what it was like to see the world from the eyes of a young boy, a child who wanted to be loved and love in return. But slowly, those feelings were torn to bits by the cruel mistress known as reality.   
  
Sex, fighting, death, drugs, all of those things replaced the innocence he once held within him, the innocence that seemed to still be within his boss.   
  
Watching him from a distance was all (y/n) could do, it was the only way to not taint the man, to keep that innocence protected, what was left of it anyways. He had heard the story of how his boss became the tenth Vongola, and it made him want to stop anyone who was after him in any way possible. Perverted men and women alike had tried to seduce him, but (y/n) would have none of it. They have tried to assassinate him, but (y/n) was faster. They even tried to shove bastard children at the boss, but they all knew better.   
  
Laughter brought the young assassin out of his thoughts, as he turned to watch them all from a distance. His family, Futa, Lambo, I-Pin, Haru and the others, all laughed and chatted with one another, enjoying each others company as well as the peaceful atmosphere the party seemed to bring.   
  
He didn't belong there.   
  
Someone like him, _filth_ like him didn't belong there.   
  
He wasn't stupid, he knew this party was for more than just a christmas celebration. He had noticed it months prior, when Tsuna mumbled to himself in front of the mirrors in his house and office, as though practicing for a speech. (Y/n) knew that this christmas, something big would happen within the Vongola family, and it was only a matter of time until it began.   
  
 _Clink!  
  
Clink!  
  
Clink!_  
  
“May I have your attention please?”  
 _  
'Ah,'_ (y/n) thought, turning away from the christmas tree in order to face his boss, who now stood in the middle of the room. _'So it begins.'  
_    
The chattering slowly came to a halt, as all eyes were now on his radiant boss. His smile lit up the room brighter than any of the lights or shining of the decorations ever could, and (y/n) quickly prepared his heart for the announcement.   
  
“I want to thank you all for coming here today, I hope that everything was to your liking,” he began, as many guests mumbled and gave short claps to show their approval. “Thank you, but aside from today being christmas and all... There's something else that needs to be addressed.”   
  
Many of the attendees began to murmur, speaking and whispering to one another with wary expressions on their faces, and who could blame them? This _was_ a mafia party so anything could happen. (Y/n) kept quiet when he heard the pair of footsteps make their way towards him, he had no need to turn around to see who it was, since he had this coming for a while now.   
  
“You knew about this, didn't you?” The deep voice asked, sending an unwanted chill down (y/n)'s spine.   
  
“Sort of, I had an idea and it was the right one...” He responded, turning his head slightly to meet with Reborn's scolding gaze. “I won't be stopping this, if that's what your worried about.”  
  
Reborn didn't respond immediately, deciding to gaze at him for extra measure, before heaving a sigh and finally opening his mouth to voicing out his true thoughts. “I know you won't, you're not stupid enough to do something stupid to Tsuna.”   
  
All (y/n) did was hum, before paying attention to what his boss was now finishing to say.   
  
“-Therefore, I have a very important question to ask a certain someone.” He announced, walking up to a surprised Kyoko with confidence. Many of the attendees, excluding Reborn and (y/n), all chatted rather loudly under their breaths, watching the two with curious eyes. Stopping before her, Tsuna sent her the most beautiful smile (y/n) had ever seen on him. “Kyoko, we've been through a lot since we were in Namimori Middle, and you've stayed by my side even to this day.”  
  
Her eyes widened, before glossing over with tears when Tsuna knelt down on one knee to the floor, her hands flying to cover her mouth when he reached into his coat pocket, and pulled out a little black box. “Sawagawa Kyoko...” He began, gazing up at her with gentle eyes, before slowly opening the box and revealing a gorgeous diamond ring.  
  
“...Will you marry me?”   
  
As many of the guests and members of the Vongola family gasped and cheered the moment Kyoko said yes, (y/n) closed his eyes and inhaled deeply through his nose.   
  
It was done.   
  
No matter how much he prepared himself for this moment, it just wasn't enough.   
  
It didn't stop his heart from shattering into a million pieces.   
  
“You'll let him go now, right?” Reborn asked, watching as the happy couple received congratulations and cheers from others.   
  
“You knew?” (Y/n) asked, inwardly cursing at himself for allowing his voice to crack. Of course Reborn knew, he was very observant, much like himself.   
  
“Of course I knew,” Reborn muttered, lowering his head until his hat was covering his eyes. “I've always been watching you, there's no way I would've missed it.”   
  
A bitter chuckle escaped (y/n)'s lips, as he glanced down at his empty glass of champaign, wishing it were something stronger and filled to the brim. He could go for a drink right about now. “Of course you wouldn't, you needed to make sure I wouldn't lay a hand on Tsuna... Not that I ever would...” With that, he turned to make his way out of there, he needed fresh air and he needed it fast.   
  
As he made his way out to the balcony of the large mansion, he failed to notice the intense gaze Reborn sent him.   
  
Yes, he needed to keep an eye on (y/n), but not for the reasons the boy thought...   
  
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-  
  
The cool winter air hit his cheeks like small slaps, a shiver running down his spine as the wind blew and the small snowflakes fell. The music and chatter from inside was muffled by the large, glass doors, leaving him with at least some sort of silence so that he could be alone with his thoughts, as he leaned against the cold railing.   
  
 _'He's getting married...'_ (Y/n) thought rather sadly, blowing out a soft sigh through his mouth, white puffs floating out and fading into the cool night. _'He won't need me around anymore... And it'll most likely be too painful to be around him and signora Kyoko...'_    
  
The glass door to the balcony opened, letting out some of the laughter and music out, before being closed and muffling all of the sound once again. Footsteps made it towards him, and stopped next to him on the railing. (Y/n) didn't want to turn around, he wasn't sure if he could handle facing him after the announcement, his heart wouldn't be able to take it.   
  
“I saw you talking with Reborn...” He began, almost as though trying hard to find a topic to talk about.   
  
 _'Don't do this...'_ (Y/n) begged, squeezing his eyes shut.   
  
“He didn't scold you did he?”  
 _  
'Please, go away... Let me be with my broken heart...'_ That overwhelming feeling was rising, his heart was beating against his chest painfully, he didn't want to feel this way, why did this man have to make him feel this way?   
  
“I'm sure he meant no harm by it... You know how Reborn is, he nags a lot but he's a nice guy...” He mumbled, shivering when a cold breeze blew by, before turning to the younger of the two with a look of concern on his face. “You're not too cold being out here by yourself are you?”   
  
“I'm fine...” (Y/n) responded, taking in deep breaths in order to try and calm himself down. “I'll be fine, I've always been and I'll continue to be...” He said this mostly to himself, as though he were trying to reassure himself that he'd be alright with everything that's happened. But it was nausiating, trying to push down all of those emotions all at once. They wanted to spew right out, to spill right in front of him and make him a sobbing mess.  
  
But he refused to let them win, he'd be damned if he ever allowed himself to look weak in front of Tsunayoshi.   
  
“If you're sure...” Tsuna muttered, before falling silent. He didn't really know where to take the conversation from there, but instead of pushing it, he decided to stay silent and enjoy the scenery of christmas in Rome, Italy from the Vongola mansion.   
  
The soft light of the moon illuminated the garden surrounding the mansion's backyard, causing all of the snow that had fallen to coat the ground in a soft, white blanket. It sparkled beautifully, like a true winter wonderland.   
  
It was almost peaceful, and enough to calm (Y/n) down, even if it were for only a couple of minutes.   
  
The pair stood there in silence, gazing out into the garden and seeing the soft lights off in the distance where the city was located. It would have been romantic in (Y/n)'s eyes, to be there with the man he had grown to love after all these years, but how could he see it that way when the man he's in love with was now engaged to another woman, one who was just as pure as he was.   
  
I guess it really was time now...   
  
It was time for him to let go...   
  
With a sigh, (Y/n) gently pushed himself away from the cold railing and turned on his heels, making his way slowly towards the entrance. He didn't bother to acknowledge his boss, it would only be heartbreaking if he did, and it would be better if he didn't let his boss see his face.   
  
“Wait (Y/n),” Tsuna called out, running after him and grabbing ahold of his wrist, stopping the younger male from moving away any further. “I know something is bothering you, and I may seem annoying pestering you about this... But I want to help you, in anyway I can...”   
  
No.   
  
Tsunayoshi shouldn't do this, his words will ruin everything.   
  
He wanted a clean getaway, to walk away without regret, why couldn't he just be allowed to leave?   
  
“In any way?” (Y/n) asked in a low voice, his face away from the elder male. He'd crumble if he gazed into Tsuna's eyes, the same eyes that he had grown to adore after all these years. No no no, he shouldn't even be thinking about what he was think, but his body and mind were not connected, he was speaking without really thinking about the consequences.    
  
“In any way I can, I want to help you...” Tsuna responded with a firm not, a fire in his eyes to show that he wouldn't back down from what he was saying.    
  
“You're too kind Sawada...” (Y/n) muttered, feeling his heart ache with each beat it gave. Tsunayoshi really was too kind, too kind for his own good. He didn't like resorting to fighting unless it was necessary, he forgave too easily, and he picked a filthy child like him off of the street. Sawada Tsunayoshi really was too kind, and his kindness must have broken so many hearts before.   
  
“(Y/n)?” Tsuna asked, noticing the way the young assassin's eyes glanced up for a mere second, before turning to face him fully.   
  
A serious expression was etched onto his face, his eyes gazing deeply into Tsunayoshi's, looking as though he had finally made a decision. Removing his hand from Tsunayoshi's hold, (y/n) took in a deep breath, before saying something in a shaky tone that Tsuna never thought he'd hear.   
  
“I love you.”   
  
It took him time to process, not that (y/n) blamed him for it, anyone would need time to process it all if they were suddenly told by someone they've taken care of for years now that they loved them.   
  
“I've been in love with you for a while now, I just never did anything about it because you're important to me...” (Y/n) explained, feeling a certain surge of confidence run through his veins. “I wasn't going to confess, and I knew you planned on proposing to Signora Kyoko, but nothing ever goes as planned...”   
  
Tsuna was speechless, still stunned by this turn of events. He knew that something had been bothering the younger male for a couple of months now, but he never knew that it was something like this. “I'm really sorry...” (Y/n) apologized softly, letting out a pained laugh under his breath, his hand reaching up to cover his face in frustration. “I can't believe I actually said it... I really am an idiot...” He murmured to himself.   
  
The silence between them was deafening, but it was helpful to actually let it out. Sure, he may have just disgusted his boss, but it was better than not saying anything at all. The snow that had been falling before had come to a stop, leaving with nothing but a breeze that picked up, yet neither of them felt the cold at that moment. Removing his hand, he lifted his head and smiled at Tsuna, almost painfully, before shaking his head at himself. “I'm also sorry for this...”   
  
Before Tsuna could ask him what he meant by that, (y/n) leaned in and planted his lips onto the taller male. The Vongola boss' eyes went wide as saucers, unable to believe what was happening. (Y/n), the 15 year old boy whom he had picked up when he was 25, was kissing him?  
  
But how did this happen?   
  
And when did these feelings develop?   
  
Tsuna finally snapped out of it when he felt (y/n)'s tongue brush against his bottom lip. Without hesitation, he pushed the 18 year old away from him with force, causing him to stumble backwards before regaining his balance. Tsuna's hand instinctively lifted to brush away at his lips, as he stared at (y/n) with an expression of utter disbelief.    
  
“Sorry...” (Y/n) apologied with a bitter smile, lifting his head to stare at his former boss. He was disgusted with him, and as much as it hurt, he already understood why. You should never kiss a soon-to-be married man, it just wasn't right. Trying hard not to let his heart shatter anymore than it already had at that strong rejection, (y/n) casually lifted his hand and pointed towards something that had been hanging right above them.  
  
“Mistletoe.”   
  
And just as he had said, hanging above the two of them was a simple mistletoe, one of which was most likely Reborn's or Haru's idea.   
  
He's ruined it.   
  
He took the chance and went on impulse, and ruined the platonic relationship he had with his boss.   
  
Ah, but what can you do?   
  
He was filthy, a filthy man who had his whole soul stained with blood and impurity. Unwanted feelings will ruin everything, it was only a matter of time until they did.  
  
Standing up straight, the smile still in place, (y/n) dusted himself of any form of snow and dirt that may be clinging to his clothes. Tsuna was still probably disgusted with him, unable to believe what had just occurred, not _wanting_ to believe it and cleaning his lips as best he could with his coat sleeve. This action, however, didn't go unnoticed by (y/n), and as heartbreaking as it was to see it, it was to be expected.   
  
“Well boss.... I guess this is goodbye...” He announced softly, bowing to the man he both respected and loved with all of his being, before standing up straight and stuffing his cold hands into his pocket.  
  
The last thing Tsuna ever heard from the younger male, before he completely disappeared off of the face of the earth that night after the party, were those traditional words spoken in a saddened tone, through a broken smile.   
  
“ _Buon Natale..._ Tsunayoshi...”


End file.
